Fatherhood on the Front Line

On two occasions this week I was confronted with the reality of life for so many (too many) ‘families’ in Northern Ireland.

Monday brought into my office a man in his 30s who has found himself in an unenviable situation of a breakdown in his relationship with his children’s mother, lack of resources to move out, no job, and the doom of the not-to-distance ‘festive season’ and its associated financial pressures. (His alternative would be to move out and sleep on his friend’s settee.)

Then on Friday I found myself in a van with two young men who were helping me transport some furniture and one of the young men, I was informed, has not had any contact with his daughter since a recent spell in prison. (He does sleep on his friend’s settee!)

Both of these men, like so many others, have found themselves on the low end of the Housing Executive’s priority list for social housing.

The balance is understandably weighed in favour of mothers. However, it makes me wonder if the lack of social housing is having a negative impact on the ability of men to play an active role in their children’s lives. How is visitation facilitated without a firm base?

As for the other young man from the van on Friday – his girlfriend is expecting a baby and I’m hoping with all my might that everything works out for them …